Thursday, May 21, 2015

LDS Conference Center to be Possible Setting for 2016 GOP Debate

LDS Conference Center May Host GOP Debate
The Salt Lake News - published Thursday, May 21, 2015

SALT LAKE CITY - As the list of Republican presidential candidates continues to expand, party officials are seeking larger public venues for next year's debates. The LDS Conference Center, which houses a stage big enough to park a 747, is among the locations the GOP is considering, sources inside the party told the News.

LDS leaders are already eagerly entertaining the possibility. "The stage at the Conference Center is equipped with seating for the LDS General Authorities and the entire Mormon Tabernacle Choir," church spokesperson, T. LaDell Tweedy said. "But we can tack on extensions that will add an extra mile in each direction."

According to Republican party sources, other possible debate venues include the Mercedes-Benz Superdome, the Indianapolis Motor Speedway, and the Vehicle Assembly Building at the Kennedy Space Center.

In the spirit of non-partisanship, Mormon leaders are also reaching out to the Democrats. "She's welcome to debate in the ward cultural hall of her choice," Tweedy said. "We'll let her have the whole stage to herself."

Related: Arizona Vacuum Cleaner Salesman Announces He Will Not Seek the Republican Nomination

***Hat tip to Gail Collins' hilarious Saturday editorial.

6 comments:

  1. Well if it happens, it will be the most riveting event to ever occur on a Mormon stage. Do I need to add that it won't be all that riveting?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Church officials should let the Republicans know that if they use the conference center they can utilize those overhead screens to project patriotic/cutsie images to match their talking points.

      Delete
  2. Well I hope they get sued for violating their 501(3)c status for religious organizations which forbids the endorsing if a political.party or.candidate

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi hekates! Good point. This is satire, of course. But it seems that today's Republican Party isn't too concerned about the division of church and state. I don't think the LDS Church ever has been.

      Delete
  3. Hell, why don't they just hold the entire Republican National Convention there? if Mitt can run the Olympics, surely he could manage a measly RNC.

    I wonder which one of Mitt's offspring will go into politics. I can't see them all staying out even though there's little money in it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I imagine at least one of them is pondering the possibility already.

      Delete