From: Dennis Newsome, Stake First Counselor and advisor to the Stake Public Affairs Council
Subject: Belly up to the bar Abbottsville Fourth!
The holiday season brings countless opportunities to show our non-member friends how hip and cool we really are. And nothing says "hip" better than than a swinging cocktail party! Think a Mormon household's too square to pull one off? Well, then think again, cool cats. You can whip up a groovy clam bake that's every bit as hoppin' as the neighbor's. All you need are a few common household ingredients.
Alcohol Substitutes
whiskey -- Karo Syrup
gin -- clam juice
vodka -- Windex
tequila -- Mountain Dew
rum -- root beer
kahlua -- balsamic vinegar
grenadine -- Kitchen Bouquet
triple sec -- Mr Bubble
schnapps -- dehydrated pear powder**
**The dust that settles at the bottom of your #10 can of dehydrated pear flakes is an excellent cocktail ingredient. It also makes great smoothies.
Use in the following recipes:
White Russian
1 1/2 oz Windex
3/4 oz balsamic vinegar
3/4 oz milk
Cosmopolitan
2 oz Windex
3/4 oz Mr Bubble
1 oz lime juice
1 oz cranberry juice
Sex on the Beach
1 oz Windex
1/2 oz dehydrated pear powder
1 dash Kitchen Bouquet
2 oz orange juice
Long Island Iced Tea
3/4 oz Windex
3/4 oz clam juice
3/4 oz root beer
3/4 oz Mountain Dew
3/4 oz Karo Syrup
3/4 oz Mr Bubble
dash of lemon juice
Rum and Coke
1 part root beer
2 parts root beer
So get shaking, you crazy kids! It's time to show the world how down we really are. Start a Sinatra album spinning, mix up your favorite poison, then saunter into the old cul-de-sac and shout out, "Hey fellow hipsters! Like to join me for a little drinky poo?"
If you would like to stop receiving these emails we'll bring the party to your house ... you crazy kids.
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