Thursday, January 28, 2010

LDS Young Women Are Keepin' Busy

To: Abbottsville Fourth Ward
From: Young Women's Presidency
Subject: Calendar
As always, the Young Women have a super special week ahead!

Monday, February 1: Family Home Evening

Tuesday, February 2: Bridal Dress-up at Abbottsville Formal Wear.
Extra padding provided for the Beehives. Mia Maids may opt to try on a prim prom dress in addition to a wedding gown. Laurels will receive a free bridal fitting. Modest bridesmaid's dresses will also be on display. Each girl will take home a fancy satin wedding dress hanger.   

Wednesday, February 3, 7 PM: Young Women's Night.
Lessons planned as follows:
Beehives: "Avoid All Loud Laughter." Girls will practice quiet tittering.
Mia Maids: "Self-Reliance Part II." Learn how to turn your glue gun into a money-maker.
Laurels: "What I Really Want for Graduation." Breast implants or a car, which will take me where I need to go?

Thursday, February 4, 7 PM: Finger Puppet Fun. 

Friday, February 5, 6 PM: Dinner Dance with the Young Men.
Assignments as follows:
Beehives: Prepare lasagna, jell-o and grated carrot salad, garlic bread, and Sister Loomis's super yummy Cool Whip and Nilla Wafer Cake for fifty people.
Mia Maids: Decorate the Cultural Hall with crepe paper and balloons. Suspend the mirrored disco ball from the ceiling. Set tables with calligraphy place cards and homemade graham cracker temple centerpieces. Serve the meal, deliver an a capella performance for dinner entertainment, then do the dishes.   
Laurels: Rewire the stage electrical system so that it can accommodate the ward's new speakers. Install them and all other stereo equipment. Hire a DJ. Construct a small platform for the karaoke competition. At the end of the evening, dissemble and store everything, including the disco ball. Deliver the crepe paper and balloons to the recycle.

Saturday, February 6, 10 AM: Young Women's Retreat.
Young Women may choose between the following:
Instant Milk and Dehydrated Chicken Bits: Super yummy recipes using your mom's food storage.
Sew Fun!: Make your own "Modest is Hottest" swimsuit cover-up.
What Flavor Man Do You Fancy? A popsicle activity.

Testimony bearing at the conclusion of the seminars. Bring the hankies we embroidered last week.

Sunday, February 7, 7 PM. Youth Fireside.
Brother Homer Samuelson's talk is entitled, "Fighting a Tyranny of Tolerance: the Mormons' Crusade Against Gay Marriage in California." Bring more hankies.

This week's recipe was contributed by twelve year old Esther Renfro of the Beehive Class:

Make chocolate instant pudding.
Mix in gummy worms and arrange attractively in a special bowl.
Cover with crushed Oreos and refrigerate.

If you would like to stop receiving these e-mails, we'll instruct the Beehive class to bring you a super yummy dessert along with a special craft every night this week.


  1. I'd like to see the Young Women practice "quiet twittering" with Jay Leno.

  2. Not funny.


  3. oh the hankies, the hankies!!! love it.

  4. I love the Wednesday night lesson plans! Hilarious, as always!

  5. Thanks, Leah, keep up the quiet tittering!

  6. For having left the Mormon church and supposedly wanting to be left along, you all sure spend a LOT of time talking/blogging about. If you've chosen to leave fine, but do it and move on. Why spend so much time obsessing?

  7. Dear "Anonymous,"

    Thanks for reading and commenting on my blog. Moving on isn't so easy for an ex-Mormon when family and friends have shunner her or him and random Mormons still show up on the doorstep trying to get her back to church.

    When the LDS Church stops sending missionaries all over the world to find new converts and reactivate the disenchanted, perhaps people like me will stop writing about it.

  8. Anonymous, you might enjoy further reading here: