Friday, February 5, 2010

Ex-Mormon Superbowl Party -- Visitors Welcome

To: Abbottsville Fourth Ward
From: Donna Banta
Subject: Superbowl Party

My dear friends in the Abbottsville Fourth Ward, since you are kind enough to include me on your e-mail list, I've decided to include you in the following:

Postmormon Superbowl Party
Sunday, February 7, 2010

Hey Abbottsville Fourth Ward!

Tired of sitting through mind-numbing meetings while the game records on DVD? Don't want to wait until 12:01 AM Monday for the kick-off? Then hang at my house with actual fun people, watch the game in real time, throw back a cold one, and root for some real Saints for a change. Be prepared for light-mindedness, loud laughter, and a helluva lot of evil speaking of the Lord's anointed. 
You want to. You know you do.

Please do NOT bring:
Your scriptures
The missionaries
Lesson #5
Scrapbooking paraphernalia 
Your testimony
Neckties and pantyhose
Nu Skin samples
Your righteous indignation
Sister Loomis's gallon sized jar of peaches (I'm still working on the last one.)
A message from The Ensign
Violators will be dealt with by our bouncer, Mark Crawford. Trust me, your garments will not protect you.

Please do bring:
A sense of humor (It's there, you'll find it.)
An open mind (Likewise.)
If possible, some of those super yummy Mormon Funeral Potatoes

No Nursery Provided

See you Sunday!


  1. we'll be there! i'll keep my mini engraved triple combination in my purse so as not to offend.

  2. actually it might be fun to read the Book of Mormon aloud after a couple of beers